TRUTH AND TRUST

JULY 16, 2020

By Pastor Steve Peich

So then, putting away falsehood, let all of us speak the truth to our neighbors, for we are members of one another.” (Ephesians 4:25)

Recently a friend of mine in the church asked me how I was “really doing.” And he added, “Don’t get all spiritual on me.” It was refreshingly straight forward. As a leader and as a pastor, it’s easy to fall into that “never let them see you sweat” nonsense that keeps one set apart from real Christian community. Because I often feel like I would have a lot to lose if people knew the struggles or doubts that I may be having, it becomes very tempting for me to hide what I’m really going through in life.

I know this sounds contradictory, given what I just said, but as much as I worry about being too open as a pastor, I always find myself drawn to openness and honesty, and flinch, or even loathe when I see or hear phoniness and smoke screens. Anyone know what I’m talking about? 

So why do I bring all this up? I know during a time like this it is easy when asked, “How are you,” to respond with, “Fine,” which is often ‘Christianese’ for, “I really don’t want to share or open up all that much.” Yes, I know, sometimes it is appropriate to not say too much. We can’t open up entirely to people we don’t trust or know very well. But I’m talking about the kind of situation where anxiety or fear of judgment and rejection starts to form a wall around our lives and leads us to stay hidden and project to the world “I’m fine,” when we are deeply hurting. This way of interacting with others only leads us into more isolation and the slow deterioration of our soul, as well as our emotional and mental well-being. As you have heard me say many times from the pulpit: What stays hidden stays hurting.

Now as much as living truthfully and authentically with each other is so good for our souls and communal health, they also create a deep sense of vulnerability. So, it takes a lot courage to put off falsehood and live truthfully with each other. But here’s the crucial piece: if we are going to live as a truth-speaking community where people can find healing and growth, then we need folks who are incredibly safe people. What would make someone safe enough for you to speak the truth of your soul’s condition? Do you see such qualities in your own life as a Christian? 

You see, without being safe people, there will be no trust, and without trust, we will lack the conditions in which truth will be shared, wounds can be healed, and sinfulness can find redemption. How is the Lord calling you to be that kind of person where others can be open, vulnerable, and transparent about their pain, struggles, or sin? What can you say or do this week that would create a safe space for others to be totally real with you?

Prayer: Lord, make me a person of trust. Help me to speak, act, and respond in ways where others feel safe enough to speak the truth of their lives, as well as making me sensitive to how I can make things unsafe for others. May I also have the courage to speak the truth of my own life, and not take the easy route of hiddenness and pretense.  In Your Gracious Name I pray, Amen.

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