Praying In the Vortex
By Pastor Steve Peich
Ever go into a Google search for something that seemed a bit nonsensical, but came out the other side with an important insight? That’s what happened when I Googled “why water creates a whirlpool when it goes down a drain” (don’t ask me why I was curious about that). The word for this phenomenon is called a vortex.
I know the word vortex sounds like some kind of fabric for ski suits, but a vortex is created by forces that want to go in opposite directions. So in the case of tub water, gravity and weight want to force the water down the drain, but air in the pipes wants to push upward through the same hole. These opposing forces create that churning whirlpool you see in the drain.
So how does that lead to anything worthy of the word insight? Well, it dawned on me that sometimes, perhaps often, our lives with God resemble this kind of convergence of “opposing forces” that want to go in different directions. Don’t we all at some point feel the vortex between doubt and faith, praise and lament, our pain and God’s promises?
Fortunately, the book of Psalms helps us to pray and live well in the spiritual vortex. One type of Psalm that does this is what some scholars call Psalms of Disorientation (also known as lament and imprecatory psalms). Disorientation Psalms are those prayers of raw expression. They are words of people who find their once smooth circumstance in life and their clear doctrines of God suddenly or painfully altered. They are left feeling devastated, alienated, fearful, and even traumatized. One researcher says that 40% of the psalms are infused with words and expressions of disorientation. In other words, it was a very common way to pray and sing as a follower of God in the ancient world.
You see an example of this in Psalm 6:2-3:
Be merciful to me, Lord, for I am faint; O Lord, heal me, for my bones are in agony, my soul also is struck with terror, while You, O Lord—how long?
You can just hear the physical and emotional trauma, as well as their wrestling with disappointment toward God. Are You going to be there for me God? Lord, where are You? How many of us have lived those exact feelings?
What I really appreciate here is the awkwardness of the grammar in verse 3. The sentence itself feels incomplete and twisted with discomfort: “my soul also is struck with terror, while You, O Lord…how long?” Sometimes real, raw, and effective prayers are ineloquent. Sometimes they don’t flow with coherence, but simply stumble out of our mouths in a disjointed manner.
But the pain is just one stream of the vortex. The other is in verse 9: “the Lord has heard my cry for mercy; the Lord accepts my prayer.”
At first we may think, how does verses 2 and 3 jive with verse 9? One minute it’s like, “God, where are You?” And then next minute the writer is totally convinced that God is right there with them. That in a nutshell, is life in the vortex: we can’t deny our agony, but we also can’t deny our God.
Let me invite you to come to God in prayer today just as you are. Come with all your ambivalence and your inarticulate sentences. Come to Him as one on a journey between doubt and faith, joy and sorrow, your pain and His promises. I’m confident that He will meet you there in the honesty of the vortex.
Prayer: Lord, right now my soul is swirling with doubts and fears, hurt and pain, as well as a desperate hope that You are with me. Please make known Your presence to me today. Help me to remain faithful in the vortex. Amen.
Share this with a friend:
