Weird Worship

OCTOBER 5, 2020

Kathy Makuakane, Executive Assistant to the Senior Pastor

When you read this, you may decide that maybe I have cracked under the pressure of life in a pandemic. But stick with me. I hope to persuade you that what at first may seem weird is really an exploration of what it means to worship.

A week or so ago, I woke up a couple of times in the night with the sense that I have been neglecting worship. Each time I went right back to sleep, but when I awoke in the morning the thought clearly persisted. I was surprised. How have I been neglecting worship? Most of my waking hours involve work for the church and interaction with Christians. I have regular times of reading and listening to the Word and devotionals. I pray a lot. I participate in Sunday services and Life Group meetings. I am immersed in the things of God. But I recognized that it wasn’t my thought. God was clearly speaking to me. And it didn’t sound like a scolding. It sounded like an invitation. So I prayed for clarity.

What came into focus is that even though I watch and listen to worship since we transitioned everything online, I haven’t been practicing that fully surrendered, physical, vocal, heart-abandoned worship that we are so familiar with when we meet in person. I also used to sing to Jesus when I drove my car, but I don’t drive much anymore. And praising God at the top of my lungs in my apartment might irritate my neighbors and embarrass my 19-year-old son. It dawned on me that I had been quieted without realizing it.

So, I started to look for new ways to engage my body and my voice in worship. The first place of breakthrough came in, of all places, a racquetball court. Following COVID-19 guidelines in my building, I was playing all by myself in an enclosed room where no one could see or hear me. So, here comes the weird part. I started praising Him every time I hit the ball!

[Whack!] “God, You are so amazing!”

[Whack!] “There is no one like You!”

I became aware of God’s presence and pleasure.

[Whack!] “Thank You for giving me this time with You!”

[Miss the ball...fits of laughter.] “Thank You for Your grace when I mess up.” 

[Whack!] “Thank you that You help me get back on my feet when I fall.” 

[Whack!] “I love You, Lord!”

Suddenly, I was overwhelmed with the realization that this was what He was inviting me to. It was just my Father and me enjoying an activity and expressing love to each other. I stopped playing and completely lost it. I shed tears of joy that the King of the whole universe would ask me...me!...to join Him in this weird, intimate, powerful time of worship. I spent the rest of that time with Him, hitting the ball, praising, laughing and crying. It was so weird and it was so wonderful. And just like that, my understanding of worship was expanded.

My son has moved back to college now, so I am alone. But not really. I have discovered a deeper intimacy with God who accepts and even enjoys my weird efforts to worship Him. Since the racquetball game, I’ve danced for Him...and I’m not a dancer. Come to think of it, I’m not a racquetball player either. I will keep looking for opportunities to praise Him in ways I have never before considered. I highly recommend it.

Lord, thank You that You created us for intimacy with You. Thank You for Your patience when we don’t get it and thank You for pursuing us. Our hearts are full when we understand Your love for us and we express ours for You. You are such a good Father! We worship You! Amen.

“But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that you should shew forth the praises of Him who hath called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.” 1 Peter 2:9

Please forgive the pun.

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